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Home  •  Blog   •  Bride’s Survival Guide: Surviving Meeting Your In-laws For The First Time

Bride’s Survival Guide: Surviving Meeting Your In-laws For The First Time

Now that you have found the one, it is not yet time to breathe a sigh of relief and starts shopping for your wedding dress. First, you will need to go through the challenge of meeting your future in-laws. It is not just a meet and greet affair. You will need your partner’s parents to be convined that, among the many in the world, you are the one who is right for their child to marry and ensure to make them happy for the rest of the time you will be together.

While meeting the in-laws for the first time might be nerve-wracking, you have to remember that your partner loves and adores you and chose you for a reason. So their parents will have no option but to follow suit.  The following is how you need to prepare:

  • Know that all the odds are in your favor: Despite what you have seen in movies, your partner’s parents are rooting for you. The only thing is that they know marriage is a life long commitment, and thus, they want to like you honestly. They are looking for what is best for their child, and if that is you, they want to love you for sure.

They will look for any reason to think that you are a stinking bee, so show yourself up and ensure that you shine.  You have to be yourself when meeting your in-laws and allow your partner’s decision to pick you, make them feel proud of you.

  • Be confident about how you look: When it comes to what you are going to wear when you visit your in-laws, take a cue from the little information you know about your future in-laws. Are they the casual types? If that is the case, then if you dress up too much might make you and them uncomfortable in the presence of each other.

Are they the trendier type? If so, then if you dress casually will make them look at you dismissively. Remember, the first impression you create is significant as it sticks forever.

Take time to get an outfit that is appropriate for that particular occasion, but at the same time, in line with who you are. Showing up when you are comfortable, manicured, and pulled together might come out as being impressive and thoughtful.

  • Offer a small goodie or gift: Though it is not something you will always have to do each time you visit, it is an excellent gesture to bring something small on your first meeting. A small thing as a token of respect is all you should carry.

If you are going to meet at a restaurant, then there will be no need to bring something along. But if you are going to meet at their home, consider carrying with you a bouquet for the season or a dessert that is freshly baked, such as cookies or scones, to show off how well you are at baking.

  • Prepare well in advance: Before going to meet for the first time, you have to ensure that you learn something about them. Ask your partner where their parents originated, the type of activities that they enjoy to indulge in, and the topics of conversations that they enjoy engaging in. It will help in forewarning you about specific great topics you might want to avoid.

During your first meeting, you have to avoid talking about controversial issues such as politics and religion. In case your in-laws bring the topics up, you can have your opinion known, but you should first read the atmosphere in the room. They are people you are going to be with for a very long time.

  • Find ground that is common: With several topics coming up, you will need to feel free to talk about yourself to your in-laws. If, for example, your future mother in law says she loves a specific type of dance, feel free to tell her which one is your favorite dance. And if your future father in law mentions that they love football, let them know that your father also has an interest in football.
  • Let the conversation be around them: You should not allow yourself to be caught up in allowing your in-laws to learn about you. It is your opportunity to learn them too. That is why you have to avoid having the temptation of talking about yourself all night long, and instead, allow the conversation to things which they want to talk about.

Ask them how they met, and they will give you a lot of information which might lead to another question about them.

You can as well ask them about childhood questions regarding your partner. Ask questions regarding family history will show that you are interested in them as people, and you want to fit in the family. It is much interesting than asking about their work-life or how their day was.

  • Avoid answering texts or checking emails: With the world saturated with technology, at times, it is hard to unplug. But if there is a time that you will need to stay off from technology, and stay focused, it is when you are meeting with your in-laws for the first time.

If you have too much time on the phone, it will make your in-laws feel that you do not appreciate their time. It is always a sign that you are not mature. You have to ensure that you stay in the room, have eye contact, and place your phone down.

  • Let them know that you love your partner: While you might think that it is not necessary to confess to them that you love their child, that might be what they are waiting to hear. And although they want to hear that you love one another, they don’t want to hear about you being intimate with each other before marriage. Avoid heavy touching. A peck on the cheek might be okay. Putting your hand around your partner while on the couch is fine.

Get advices regarding the how to behave when with sister in-laws, brother-in-laws, uncles, and other extended families by going through the ultimate bride’s survival guide.

 

Photo by Any Lane

Photo by JoEllen Moths

Photo by Caleb Oquendo

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