The Bride’s Survival Guide: Choosing Bridesmaids
No doubt that choosing your bridesmaids is an overwhelming activity. How are you going to settle down on those who will be your bridesmaids from your group of many friends? What is the best way to ensure that you come up with the final list?
- It is not a must that you return the favor: Just the way you want your wedding day to be unique; it is fine to want unique bridesmaids. You should not feel that you have an obligation to reciprocate and ask someone to be your bridesmaid just because you were theirs.
You should start from a blank page, write down the names of those you think should be your potential bridesmaids and think of what you will be asking each of them to do. Who among them are you going to rely on?
- Ask them nicely: From the word go, make your friends feel special about your wedding. Ensure to ask them to be your bridesmaids in a way that will register in their mind for a very long time to come. You should be ready for tears. To ask someone to be your bridesmaid can be an emotional thing so if they start crying, know that it is okay to do so.
- Check out on personalities: Those you pick are going to work as a team in the run-up to your wedding. Find out if all of them are going to get along well. Check out their personalities and see if they will easily mingle together.
If you are someone who is very organized, it doesn’t matter if your Maid of Honor is a bit laid back. If you think you are going to be irritated or break down along the way, getting a Maid of Honor who will be able to calm you down will be a plus for you.
- Take your time: You don’t have to rush to ask people to be part of your bridesmaids’ team. You have to take your time because once you include them and alert them in person, there is no way to remove them without hurting their feelings. If you are planning to wed in a year’s time, it is advisable that you wait a while before confirming your bridesmaids.
In case someone you have picked moved away or started a family before then, it might be hard for her to assist you in planning your wedding and thus, not a good pick for a bridesmaid.
- Family affair: During your wedding planning, the family must be involved. There is always a space to involve that young flower girl or a small bridesmaid. Though they might be invited to some of the activities during the wedding planning, you will be loved for doing so.
If you ask a young family member to be a flower girl or a bridesmaid, you have to think carefully if there are several children of the same age. Leaving some and picking others might create a problem that might haunt you forever.
- Old and new: You are free to mix your old and new friends and bring them on board from high school, college, university, workplace, and anywhere else. All of them have you as a common factor. If you are getting them from different social groups, it will be best to get an afternoon where they come together and know each other even before the planning of the wedding kicks off.
- Less is more: It doesn’t mean that when you have more bridesmaids they will help you more. You might just require a pair of brilliant maids and you will be all sorted. You don’t necessarily need to pick your female friends as bridesmaids.
They could be in the welcoming team, give readings, or be part of other things around the wedding like in charge of catering. Remember that, if you are the one going to foot for their accessories and dresses, the more of them you have, the more the expenses on the same.
- It is okay to be unique: There are no rules when it comes to picking bridesmaids. It is not a must that you have an even number regardless of what you will be told by those around you. It is not a must that you have more than one. Remember the wedding is your day and you are at liberty to do with it what you think is right.
- Trust your instincts: When you look at someone, it is very easy for you to tell if they will make a great one or not. You should trust your instincts and avoid asking someone because you have a feeling that you should.
It is hard for people to change and, even if you love a certain friend, if you know they tend to be unreliable, then they are not the best choice for bridesmaids.